And they wonder why.

The family that drinks together...

2009-03-12T18:54:00.002-04:00

The sign reads "This is our favorite shop."

Nothing says good old family fun more than a trip to the local liquor store!

"Mommy moomy LOOK Strawberry flavored Vodka!! Can I please have some, pretty, pretty, pretty please with an olive on top!"

"Why sure Billy," daddy says, "oh and John this Scotch will make you a big strong man."

"oh George darling, don't forget the whiskey for little Mary's gums, she's teething you know and that will help dull the pain and help her sleep." mom chimed in.

Play ball

2009-03-05T13:33:00.002-05:00

Sort of gives in the pocket new meaning.

Mom was right

2009-02-04T21:02:00.000-05:00

Remember your mother always telling you to be sure to wear clean underwear each day when you go out. Just because you never know, accidents happen and you don't want to be caught with dirty undies, or in his case no undies.

Oh how I feel for the poor firefighter right now.

Ole ole ole

2009-01-10T17:59:00.002-05:00

Truth in advertising

2009-01-09T15:34:00.003-05:00

It is so refreshing to see some honest advertising. I'd buy this guy a beer just for that fact alone.

Santa's got a brand new...

2008-12-17T13:50:00.003-05:00

Sack....

Have you been naughty or nice?

The Perfect Gift

2008-11-24T14:15:00.002-05:00

Yes it is that time of year again when our thoughts turn to Christmas presents. For all you men out there like my husband who waits until the last minute, why don't you give the gift that keeps on giving.

Then again, maybe not. I cannot believe that the manager approved of this sign. Sure it is good for a few giggles but come on now.

quotes scare me

2008-11-12T12:50:00.006-05:00

Yes I am one of those people who just about always carries a camera in her purse, and at times like tis I am glad I do.

I have to wonder why wash hands is in quotes. Is it some inside joke at the establishment? If you ever seen the movie Waiting you know where I am coming from. Now I know that it is just a typo, (please let it just be a typo), but still the grammar geek inside of me is horrified. And which employee is it that has to wash their hands? I'd hope it was all of them.

Bob Barker was on the right path

2008-11-09T19:09:00.003-05:00

but I think this guy is right on the money. I think we all know at least one person who really should be fixed.

No shit.

2008-09-16T11:19:00.002-04:00

Notice the quote, "We had no idea anyone was burried there". It is a mausoleum, what the hell did they think was inside of it, sunshine, lollipops, and rainbows? Headlines like this leave me speechless, and makes me wonder just how some of the human race manages to survive.

And you thought your job was the pits

2008-09-07T20:57:00.003-04:00

Just always remember it could be a whole lot worse.

A religious experience

2008-09-05T20:38:00.003-04:00

I have to disagree, I have known a few people who swear that they have seen God by err...laying in bed.

This explains a lot

2008-09-04T13:52:00.003-04:00

Well after seeing this I can finally understand why Taco Bell is always screwing up our orders. My husband always shakes his head and wonders if they seek out employees that cannot get orders right. Well we now have concrete proof of it. I can't even tell you how many times that TB screwed up our orders. Damn those chalupas being so good, if it weren't for them and the steak tacos we'd never set foot in one again.

You know there had to be somebody.

2008-09-02T21:50:00.003-04:00

I love it when I see signs like this, I really do. You know that it means there that had to be at least one total dipshit out there who had to actually do it.

Here fishy fishy.

2008-08-27T21:18:00.005-04:00

Wonder where they get their daily specials?

Well that helps...NOT!

2008-08-21T21:01:00.001-04:00

Next time try Dear Abby.

and if you believe this...

2008-08-19T23:43:00.004-04:00

I got some choice property in Southern Florida that I'd love to sell ya, oh and a bridge in Brooklyn too.

Sorry fellas size DOES matter, no matter what we may tell you.

Slippery when wet

2008-08-18T00:49:00.002-04:00

Makes one wonder just what is on those floors. Sure hope they aren't sticky as well. I'd hate to be one of the cleaners here that is for sure.

Funny how the addition of a little note of caution to customers can make something that I'd just roll my eyes at passing by into something that makes me want to wet my panties.

Toilet Humor

2008-08-17T20:22:00.001-04:00

This guy really knows his shit!

Bring on the meat!

2008-08-13T15:34:00.006-04:00

After seeing an image like this I am all bring on the meat baby. I may never eat another veggie again!

Domestic dolts

2008-07-15T20:57:00.002-04:00

Silly me, all this time I thought Mexico was another country. Damn the American school system.

*A big thank you to Jameroo for letting me use her photo.

Hanes HER way

2008-07-13T20:50:00.003-04:00

Look closely...

Now I have to ask you this?
Who sits and looks at a pair of men's briefs and says hmmmm...I can make a nice summer top from these!! On the other hand...$6 for a three pack is a good price!!

This is why I am NOT a fan of NASCAR

2008-07-10T21:33:00.004-04:00

YIKES is all I can really say at this photo. If I were forced to sit behind this at a track I think that I'd soon be jumping the barrer and praying that I get hit. There is just not enough eye bleach to wash this image out of my brain.

Thanks for the tip

2008-06-28T10:57:00.002-04:00

Ah people after my own heart! The most I ever did was have my then baby sister chant "Where's my food?!" at Pizza Hut after a 40 minute wait for a pan pizza. Shit heads didn't even comp our bill. They brought us a free order of bread sticks. BFD right?

Holy guano Batman

2008-05-31T21:04:00.006-04:00

Looks like Bruce Wayne is screwed.

Is the force still with him?

2008-05-26T22:03:00.004-04:00

Thank you to all Vets past, present, and future!

Looks like tough times are hitting just about everyone these days. You know it has to be bad when you see a Sith Lord begging on the streets. Then again you have to wonder why Darth just isn't mugging people with his life saber or using the force to crush people's windpipes when they won't hand over their wallets. Use the force Vader, wave your hand in front of someone's face and say, "You will hand me your wallet, and that watch."

A smart man you are not. Lazy you are. Shame.

Let's get physical

2008-05-25T00:47:00.003-04:00

Physical fitness has become so important to so many people recently, more and more people are heading to the gym. People are eating healthier, quitting smoking, drinking more water, taking the stairs instead of the elevator...

well okay. Some are. Am I missing something here? Isn't the point of going to the gym to get some exercise? Do these these people realize that they are defeating the purpose of going to the gym? Are 15 steps really too many to walk up? Or is this just another testament to the true laziness of the American?

Got bilk?

2008-05-20T21:12:00.002-04:00

A brewery in Hokkaido, Japan recently released a low-malt beer using milk. The idea came from the son of a liquor store who is in the dairy farm industry. After having a problem of discarding milk, he proposed the local brewery to produce the milk beer. As one-third of beer is milk, it is the good way to help local farmers. The beer called “Bilk” came from beer+milk. The taste of beer is like a taste of fruits and it goes well with sweets. Because of its fruity flavor, Bilk hopes to be popular among women.

Erin Brockovich ; She's a superfreak

2008-05-14T21:33:00.004-04:00

While surfing the net one day I came across this picture. I saved it because it made me giggle and now once again I have use for it. Granted it is from the year 2000, but I think it will fit in well here. You know that this was done on purpose by some teenager working at the theater for minimum wage for shits and giggles.

She don't swallow

2008-05-13T13:00:00.004-04:00

Sometimes you come across an ad and just have to say What the hell?

If my husband sees this ad he'd for sure run out ad buy me the entire Puma line. I guess by wearing Puma products women get this urge to drop to their knees and give blow jobs.

I'm coming.

2008-05-12T23:48:00.003-04:00

Okay I admit it I have a 13 year old boy living inside of me. I seen this slide and just could not stop giggling. Sometimes I wonder just who designs these things and wonder if it is on purpose. I can picture them as a bunch of 30-something virgins who could not not get laid at hooker-con. I see them snickering away just like I did, getting off on the whole dirty aspect of such an innocent child's play thing. (Then again part of me would like to get a whole lot of vanilla pudding and well you get the picture ;-) )

LOL Cats branching out?

2008-05-03T16:58:00.004-04:00

Ok I have to admit that yes I have laughed at a few of the LOL Cats entries. But come on now McDonalds without the cute kitty it just does not work.

Sometimes mom really does know best.

2008-04-30T20:12:00.003-04:00

Remember mom telling you "don't take candy from strangers", well she was talking about this guy here.

A little light humor

2008-04-29T14:26:00.001-04:00

My friend Wendy sent me this gem, thanks bunches!

I wonder if they are giving these out as product promos at some Doctor's offices?

Now that is what I call support.

2008-04-28T19:13:00.004-04:00

But I need to know will they lift and seperate?

Proselytizer be gone!

2008-04-24T01:11:00.003-04:00

Ok not an ad, sign or stupid human, but something I found to be as funny as hell none the less. Something one might try when those pesky proselytizers come a knocking at your door. I don't know if it is the late hour here or my spiked lemonade but I am giving serious consideration to this idea. I am perfectly happy in my heathen ways here and have no desire to convert to any other belief system. I enjoy being a sarcastic beotch too much. ;P

Hell with the cost of the ad she better put out.

2008-04-22T13:35:00.003-04:00

Points have to go to the guy for creativity, although I still wouldn't respond to his ad.

Decisions...decisions.

2008-04-20T21:15:00.004-04:00

Got to love this lady and her ad. I don't know the longer I stay married the more I start to think I'll keep the cat.

The head of their class they were not.

2008-04-19T15:39:00.003-04:00

No you are not seeing things. Yes that is a power strip in a pool being supported by flip flops. And yes those drunken fools are in the pool. It almost makes me want to throw somthing into that pool to tip the power strip and fry those idiots. How stupid do you have to be? Even my 3 year old knows that water and electricity do not mix. Any one want to bet that these boys are still single?

No better advertising than this

2008-04-14T13:34:00.003-04:00

They have to be good right? You don't see Christ dying for Krispie Kremes now do you?

This about sums it up

2008-04-08T13:44:00.004-04:00

Any one else feel like they are taking it up the ass when it comes to gas prices. Our local news reports that our area is paying fifteen cents more than the national average. The cheapest I have seen has been $3.49 in my area. SOMETHING NEEDS TO BE DONE ABOUT THIS, come Memorial Day weekend they are expecting at least $4.00 a gallon. I wonder when the rationing is going to start.

Where was the layout editor on this one?

2008-04-01T20:15:00.003-04:00

Ok sometimes you have to wonder if the person working on the layouts of the ads actually reads what the ads are for, or if they just have a twisted sense of humor.

Nothing like the smell of...

2008-03-31T21:20:00.002-04:00

Poopy seed bread, ahhhh breath it in. I wonder if it tastes like it smells?

Those aren't like mommy's.

2008-03-28T08:37:00.005-04:00

Seems this daddy is getting his boy off to an early start.

I just love the look on this kid's face. I keep coming up with all these captions for this picture.

Right on!

2008-03-26T13:50:00.003-04:00

Something any true hockey fan will agree upon. Got to love those refs with their half-assed calls.

Yeah it is the noise that is dangerous...

2008-03-10T20:50:00.003-04:00

She says as she puffs away on a cigarette. Because obviously they will not affect the unborn baby in any, shape, or form. What does the Surgeon General know anyways? Don't you just love people like this?

Wal Mart strikes again!

2008-03-07T10:21:00.003-05:00

Seriously where do they find some of their employees? More importantly WHY do they hiring them?

While the cake for dear Suzanne was essentially ruined by the stupidity of the cake decorator working there, (the one that has no common sense and that cannot spell), it was kept just for the laugh factor. Luckily Suzie-Q didn't mind and got a good chuckle out of it herself.

Umm yeah, that will work.

2008-02-28T00:57:00.004-05:00

I know this is mean, but I almost hope that some one took the bike, or at least moved it to another near by location just to teach the owner a lesson. The purpose of a bicycle lock is to lock the bike to place where no one can steal it. By using a pole like this totally defeats the purpose don't you agree?

Always read the fine print.

2008-02-26T19:32:00.004-05:00

Things are not always that they seem.
If it sounds too good to be true it probably is.

You think that these would be lessons that she should have learned about by age 26, but then again I don't think she got hired at Hooters for the size of her brain.

Desperate?

2008-02-25T16:37:00.005-05:00

Are you lonely? Sick of sitting alone home on Saturday nights? Are you missing that someone special in your life?

Well look no longer you can always....DATE LANCE

From the site:
Who is Lance?
Hometown: Potomac, MD
Lives in: Provo, UT.
Age: 31
Occupation: Director of Marketing, Logoworks
Height: 6'3" Weight: 180
Hair Color: Brown
Eye Color: Brown
Mission: Finland
Degrees held: BS in Finance, BYU; MBA, Harvard
Special Skills: Basketball and negotiation
Favorite Restaurant: Los Hermanos

Who is Lance looking for?
We're not totally sure, but whoever it is, it's taking him a little longer than usual for a guy with these credentials. Lance is a really nice guy, so someone nice would probably be good. And he's one of eight kids, and we think he wants a lot of kids, so you'd have to be down with the 'big family' thing. Why don't you submit yourself, submit a friend, or tell a friend to help us help him?

Are you woman enough for Lance? Do you really really need a date? Drop Lance a line, hey you never know!

That wasn't chicken.

2008-02-22T13:32:00.004-05:00

Location , location, location! How many times have we heard this? It is all about the location. I like to think that some twisted mind in the pet store did this on purpose. It is a joke right up my alley. While I know all the urban legends regarding my favorite food, this just cracked me up.

I wonder how many other people noticed this.

Ewww gross, but point taken

2008-02-16T16:43:00.002-05:00

A restroom advertising promoting hand-washing. The sign on the doorknob says: "You washed. This guy didn't." or "92% of guys say they washed. 34% were lying."

Very clever way of getting the message across. I wash do you? That is one thing that always squicks me out, when I see people not washing after they have used a toilet I just cringe. If I have one of my daughters with me in the restroom I will make a point of telling them how very important it is t wash your hands after you go. Still need to work up the nerve to confront the offenders one on one though.

Coffee shakedown

2008-02-10T10:26:00.001-05:00

Latte art or coffee art refers to designs created on the tops of espresso based drinks by a barista. These designs are usually created in one of two ways and sometimes using a combination of both. The first method is by manipulating the flow of milk from a jug into the espresso (known as free pour latte art). The second is by drawing designs with an implement (known as etching), using stencils, powders and milk foam. Latte art is most commonly seen on a latte, although it can also be part of the presentation of a cappuccino, a cafe mocha or even an espresso macchiato. As the popularity of premium espresso-based drinks has risen, the craft of garnishing through latte art has as well. As has the costs of said drinks. Honestly there is no coffee in the world that is worth paying $5.00 plus a cup for, hell anything over a $2.00 is too much. Honestly why pay more for something that is only going to last the walk from the counter to your seat.

No. No you are not.

2008-02-09T18:02:00.001-05:00

I have nothing at all against tattoos. I have three of them. I am totally against dumb shits like this guy, getting them.

Just in case you didn't know...

2008-02-08T10:52:00.001-05:00

I always find instructions and some warnings on items to be humorous. Because you know that there really are people out there that stupid. You know that some dumbass somewhere actually had to do this.

Some more I have come across;

On a child's Superman costume: Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly. (no shit)
On a curling iron: For external use only!
On a hair dryer: Do not use in shower
On a can of air freshener: For use by trained personnel only.(You need special training for this?)
On a string of Christmas lights: For indoor or outdoor use only. (umm ok)
On a box of Midol PMS relief tablets: Warning: do not use if you have prostate problems.
On a package of peanuts: Warning: May contain nuts. (get out of here)
On A toilet plunger: Caution: Do not use near power lines. (I have to know thw back story on this one)
On a floodlight: This floodlight is capable of illuminating large areas, even in the dark.
On a mattress: Warning: Do not attempt to swallow.
On a pack of matches: Caution: Contents may catch fire.
On a RCA Television Remote Control: Not Dishwasher Safe
On Home Depot Treated Lumber: Do not consume.
On a 35 mm camera: This camera will only work when film is inside.
On a bar of Dial soap: Directions: Use like regular soap. (as opposed to what?)
On a 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow: Not intended for highway use.
On a package of deodorant: Do not use intimately. (close call on if I really want to know).

The list could go on and on. It saddens me that there are so many stupid people out there. Even sadder I think I know some of them.

Laissze Les Bons Temps Rouler

2008-02-05T11:41:00.001-05:00

Yes it is Fat Tuesday today, Mardi Gras, the last day of Carnival, looks like Billy's got his beer goggles on. I think it would take a lot more than those two cans to get me to look at Billy that way.

So grab that King Cake, Pączki, or pancakes and enjoy one more day of debauchery, after all that is what today is all about!

Ok I just flashed ya where are my beads?

Momma always said...

2008-02-03T10:00:00.002-05:00

to put on a clean pair of underwear each day because, "you never know you just might get hit by a bus and you wouldn't want them to find you with dirty underwear on now would you?".

Too bad this guy is wearing his mamma's undies today.
I bet cracks were made all day about it.
I just don't think that he can pull off the hot pink thong look.

If you are going to work, and there is a chance you might be bending over you might want to be careful what kind of underwear you pick to wear that day.

Poor kid ain't got no chance.

2008-02-01T11:55:00.002-05:00

Okay that hurt me a little to write.

Just say NO to double negatives! Please.

A double negative is the nonstandard usage of two negatives used in the same sentence so that they cancel each other and create a positive. In Shakespeare's day, double negatives were considered emphatic, but today, they are considered grammar mistakes.

I also consider them the mark of an uneducated speaker.

Sorry babe but you can't get by on those good looks all your life.
A proper education will take you farther and get you more respect.

No beating around the bush

2008-01-29T08:02:00.001-05:00

Now while those that choose to live this lifestyle will agree that there is nothing sexual about it. In fact many will state the health benefits and religious beliefs of going around in the buff.

A sign like this is just an open invitation.

Kind of an oxymoron isn't it?

2008-01-27T12:48:00.001-05:00

I don't think that it is possible to use the words George Bush and intelligence in the same sentence. Granted this is in reference to George H. Bush and not our current idiot in office. But still renaming the Headquarters compound of the Central Intelligence Agency located in Langley, Virginia the "George Bush Center for Intelligence" does not seem like the smartest move.

How about some fries to go with that shake?

2008-01-24T11:29:00.001-05:00

Now that is what he calls a Happy Meal.
You cannot wipe that grin of Ronald's face.
Kind of gives new meaning to the McDonald's Playplace don't it?

Were you expecting anything less of me? If you have been following this blog you should have known better by now. (For the record no that is not me.)

I got a VD!!

2008-01-23T22:14:00.002-05:00

And you can have one too, well that and number of other ailments.
Giant Microbes

Yes gone are the days of stuffed bears, puppies, and bunnies. Nothing says I love you like giving the one you love the Clap.

According to their site~ We make stuffed animals that look like tiny microbes—only a million times actual size! Now available: The Common Cold, The Flu, Sore Throat, Stomach Ache, Cough, Ear Ache, Bad Breath, Kissing Disease, Athlete's Foot, Ulcer, Martian Life, Beer & Bread, Black Death, Ebola, Flesh Eating, Sleeping Sickness, Dust Mite, Bed Bug, and Bookworm (and in our Professional line: H.I.V. and Hepatitis).

Each 5-to-7 inch doll is accompanied by an image of the real microbe it represents, as well as information about the microbe.

They make great learning tools for parents and educators, as well as amusing gifts for anyone with a sense of humor!
* * * *
What a clever way to let your latest lay know that now they too may have herpes. Sure beats the old, "umm by the way there is something you should know", speech. How could they be mad at you once you hand them that cute little critter?

So this Valentines Day forget the roses or jewelry because nothing says I love you babe like Chlamydia does.

Sweet Dreams

2008-01-22T12:21:00.001-05:00

Ahhh Japan you bring us so many wonderful inventions, including this...

Hizamakura knee lap pillow

Missing that special someone?
Longing for the feeling of comfort and warmth you only from a woman’s lap?
Maybe you just want to take a nap and need a pillow?

Shaped just like a beautiful woman’s lap, kneeling in Japanese-style, the Hizamakura “Lap Pillow” gives the best re-creation available, complete with your choice of a red or black skirt to top it off. Hizamakura is soft and elastic to the touch, and perfectly suited to lying your head on. You’ll be surprised at how comfortable and real it feels!
Specifications:• Material: Polyurethane• Skirt material: Polyester• Skirt Color: Black or Red (please choose one)• Box size: 285mm × 590mm × 285mm• Weight: Approximately 1.9kg

In a way I think this is better than having an actual head in your lap, no drool, no sweat, no complaints if you move. I have too many things to do each day then to sit there while someone sleeps in my lap.

Hey babe, want to go to Fucking today?

2008-01-21T11:23:00.001-05:00

What a dirty, dirty town.

Fucking, Austria
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

The frequently stolen traffic sign, at the entrance to the village of Fucking.
Fucking ['fʊkɪŋ]; rhymes with "looking") is an Austrian village in the municipality of Tarsdorf in the Innviertel region of western Upper Austria.

Geography
It is located 32 km north of Salzburg and 4 km east of the border with Germany, half an hour's ride from Petting in Bavaria.

History
The village is known to have existed as "Fucking" since at least 1070 and is named after a man from the 6th century called Focko. "Ing" is an old Germanic suffix indicating the people of the root word to which it is attached, thus "Fucking," in this case, means “(place of )Focko’s people." The village has a population of 93.

Fucking's most famous feature is a traffic sign with its name on it, beside which tourists often stop to have their photograph taken. It is a commonly stolen street sign. Significant amounts of public funds have been spent on replacing the stolen signs.

In 2004, mainly due to the stolen signs, a vote was held on changing the village's name, but the residents voted against doing so. In August 2005 the road signs were replaced with theft-resistant signs welded to steel and secured in concrete to prevent further chances of the sign being stolen.

With only 93 people in that town I wonder what there is to do in town, well besides the obvious. I have to laugh at the fact that people were constantly stealing the street sign. I picture it hanging in some boy's university dorm room all his friends getting a good laugh.

A woman after my own heart.

2008-01-19T01:01:00.001-05:00

You go girl!

Fun field trip.

2008-01-16T10:02:00.001-05:00

A school bus at a porn shop hmmm....I wonder who signed the permission slip for this one?

Why should Fido have all the fun?

2008-01-15T09:27:00.001-05:00

Not everyone is a dog person, so why should Fido, Rex, Rover get all the fun and benefits of getting out of the house? Everyone enjoys a change of scenery, now Goldie can too.

Don't let your favorite fish get bored by keeping him in the tank all day long...take him with you in this handy traveling case.

No longer do you need to have a friend come over to feed him while you go on vacations just bring your little fish friend along.

Sick of seeing those celebs showing off their little dogs all the time? Well one up them by showing the world how much your little buddy means to you.

It is a great conservation piece and the kids will love it!

Just remember not to jostle the bag. They don't like it.

Laziness taken to a whole new level.

2008-01-14T11:16:00.001-05:00

Now let me set aside the all of the safety concerns that this image stirs up in me. That is a whole rant in itself. (Stupid twit of a mom there). But how freaking lazy do you have to be to use a Segway Human Transporter to walk your child. Or even use one instead of just plain old fashioned walking? I find it so sad that some are this lazy. I mean come on now people walking won't kill you, but using something that has no brakes and whose movements are controlled by yours just might cause an accident or two. (Especially if you are preoccupied by something else, umm let's say the safety for your child?).

I really cannot see an way that a healthy, able bodied person would use this except for the laziness factor.

Service you just won't believe.

2008-01-12T15:52:00.001-05:00

Wonder if they aren't there in 30 minutes if they're free?

Fashion faux pax

2008-01-08T13:48:00.001-05:00

Well shucks y'all. Here I done n' made some fashion fo pa. Ias done n' gone made a fool of myself by wearin' just some jeans n' a long sleeve cotton shirt to the local Wally World. Ias shoulds of been in my Sunday best to go there. I must let that Mz Debra know that Ias in da wrong there, and to thank her for setting me straight. Ooo I a hear dat they be buildin' a Super Wal Mart near me soon. I guess Ias be needing to go and get me some formal wear, I mean really fancy duds for that place.

Ok seriously now dressed up for Wal Mart? Wal Mart? (bangs head on desk).

Must be slow sports week when....

2008-01-07T09:04:00.001-05:00

You see this....Extreme Ironing!

I shit you not!

our local news even did a segment on it and had one of their reporters iron at the base of Niagara Falls

http://www.wgrz.com/video/vplayer.aspx?sid=52876&aid=35656

Now just how drunk did a bunch of guys have to be to come up with this idea? I cannot believe that this so called sport has a pretty regular following.

Wikipedia's entry on this includes the following;

Extreme Ironing (or EI) is an extreme sport and a performance art in which people take an ironing board to a remote location and iron a few items of clothing. According to the official website, extreme ironing is
“the latest danger sport that combines the thrills of an extreme outdoor activity with the satisfaction of a well-pressed shirt."

History

Before heading into the mainstream, extreme ironing was used by the band Monster Magnet in the video for their song "Negasonic Teenage Warhead" from their album Dopes to Infinity (1995) (this useage was most likely unintentional, as the video features the band members performing perfectly ordinary activities on asteroids). However, purists of the sport will claim that it was started in 1997 in Leicester, East Midlands, England by resident Phil Shaw in his back garden. Shaw came home from what he recalls as a hard day in a Leicester knitwear factory.[3] Preferring the idea of an evening out rock climbing, he decided to combine the two activities into a new extreme sport. In June 1999, Shaw, who uses the nickname "Steam", embarked on an international tour to promote the activity. The stops included the United States of America, Fiji, New Zealand, Australia and South Africa. An encounter with German tourists in New Zealand led to the formation of a group called "Extreme Ironing International", and the German Extreme Ironing Section or GEIS.

As extreme ironing has branched off, the conditions can gain in extreme activity. For example a branch of ironing has been developed that includes both bungee jumping and well-pressed clothing. Bungee ironing is, what some would call, the ultimate in the thrill of extreme ironing.

A documentary, titled Extreme Ironing, was filmed for Britain's Channel 4. The programme concentrates on the rivalry between the EIB (Extreme Ironing Bureau) and a breakaway group called Urban Housework. It was later aired on the National Geographic Channel.[2]

In 2003, Phil Shaw released a book published by New Holland Publishers, also entitled Extreme Ironing[4]. The following year saw the release of a DVD titled Ironing Under the Sky, which was produced by Hot Under the Collar (HUTC) Productions. A follow-up documentary was made in 2004, this time by RDF and HUTC, which was aired on Sky's Adventure One channel the following year.

In 2003 the Rowenta Trophy was won by a group from South Africa by ironing across a gorge at the Wolfberg Cracks.

In 2004, the EIB traveled to the US on the Rowenta Tour to recruit additional ironists and ironed at Mount Rushmore, New York, Boston and Devils Tower.

Ummmmm okay I think I'll pass. I dread the day ESPN picks this up, bad enough they broadcast poker games and kids playing Speed Stackers. Hell if ESPN really is that hard up for stuff to put on the air why not make the life of mom's a sport. The diaper dash, keep the wet kid in the tub, followed by dress the kid who loves to be naked. Feeding time, if the baby keeps the strained peas inside the mouth 5 points! Then again it may be more fun watching the dad's do all that, and still managing to have dinner on the table, laundry and dished done, house dusted and vacuumed. grocery shopping done. You know all that stuff moms usually do and don't get paid for.

Kind of gives new meaning to the word Ironman.

How true...how true

2008-01-05T00:16:00.001-05:00

I think that hell is a more appropriate name than Shell for this gas station as well as all the others now a days. Something really needs to be done about the outrageous prices that we are paying at the pump. It is pretty sad when 1/3 of my weekly allotment of money for gas, groceries, and other small stuff is being spent on gas alone.

For the couple that shares everything

2008-01-01T01:00:00.001-05:00

I bring you the TwoDaloo. Billed as A Supertoilet That Saves Rocky Marriages and The Planet

The TwoDaLoo is billed as the world's first toilet two people can use ... at the exact same time. It brings couples closer together and conserves our water supply all with one flush. The TwoDaLoo features two side-by-side toilet seats with a modest privacy wall in between. An upgraded version includes a seven inch LCD television and iPod docking station.

A steal at $1,400 well for the basic model, (and that is of course if you buy the minimum of twelve). I wonder what the mark up on these things are and how much the upgraded version goes for? How soon until we start seeing these at the Home Depot? Never I hope.

Now I love my husband but I really don't want to be in the bathroom with him while he is taking a dump. Nor do I want him in there while I am. The only good thing that I can see about it is that my kids always seem to have to go at the exact same moment. That or when the family is sick with the stomach flu, we're not all fighting for a place to vomit in. (Trust me four people sick with the flu at the same time is not a pretty picture).

Now I don't know about you, but most men I know already spend a lot of time in the john. A lot of my friends and family members always seem to have this gripe about their husbands and sons. It makes me wonder what the next will step be? A mini fridge in the cabinet under the sink. That would be a man's paradise. We might not see them ever again, that is of course until we had to go.

http://www.wiserep.com/productDetails.php?id=5769

I never would of guessed this.

2007-12-28T22:37:00.001-05:00

Color me surprised, never in a million years would I ever think that a road might actually get some water on it during rain.

I don't know what scares me more the thought of a wet road or the fact that there is a sign warning people about it. I mean if they cannot connect those dots they do not deserve to be behind a wheel.

When you got to go...

2007-12-27T10:32:00.002-05:00

...you have to go no matter where you are.
I guess now a days people are just too busy to walk into that coffee shop, or McDonald's to use the restroom. No lets just step into this public urinal on a crowded street where hundreds of people may pass, drop your drawers and piss away.

Hope you don't get stage fright buddy. I hear that these public urinals have been seen in many European cities and even in China. I hope that this European trend (ha!) is not one that comes stateside anytime soon.

Merry Christmas!

2007-12-24T10:01:00.000-05:00

Wishing you all a very Merry Christmas!

I am up at arms with those people who are Santa is a bad role model. That Santa needs a make over, saying he is too fat and has a foul mouth. (The ho, ho, ho thing) Get a grip people! Santa is fat, he always was, he should always be this way. I love me some fat Santa. And think about it he needs the extra insulation if he is going to live up there in the frigid temperatures of the North Pole, duh! Ho ho ho is a laugh, the whole "ho meaning whore thing is a new thing in the grand scheme of things).

Santa does not play a part of childhood obesity, nor does it promote it. Poor parenting and letting your kids eat garbage and not kicking their butts outside to play does. When I was young on a nice day I was not allowed to stay inside and play video games or watch television. My mom kicked us outside to play. Going to McDonald's was a treat not a several times a week occurrence. Getting a pizza was a big thing in the house I grew up in.

Please do not attack a man who has only one job. To bring happiness into the lives of children everywhere.

Now while the moms out there wouldn't mind seeing a Santa like this, we surely don't want to see this one at the mall with our little ones on his lap. It is more of a him under the tree with us on his lap kind of thing. ;)

If you need this...you should not reproduce.

2007-12-21T10:45:00.001-05:00

Now if you need instructions on how to check a baby's diaper, it probably means that you should not breed. Ever.

While it will cause great amusement for others, "hey honey, remember when Billy was a baby and I asked you to check if he needed to be changed... (hysterical laughter) and you (panting from laughing so hard) shoved your entire hand down the back of his diaper and it came out covered in poop? It will spread to the entire family, friends, who in turn will share the moment with their family and friends and so on and so on. It will no doubt lead to a lifetime of mockery for you. (Much deserved mockery I may add and just wait until the grandkids find out).

To read or not to read...

2007-12-20T11:40:00.001-05:00

I have a deep love of reading, it is one of my most favorite things to do. When I was in the fifth grade my teacher told my mom that I read too much. Yes you heard that correctly, I read too much. I should be out playing while at recess, not sitting on the swing with my nose in a book. Yeah like I’d rather stand there while they boys whipped dodge balls at my head. I don’t think so. Now where did I put that book mark?

My parents of course thought that she was bat shit crazy, and they were happy that their 10 year old was reading on her own for pleasure. I’d like to know how many children do that now a days. Most children would rather be plopped down in front of the television, or plugged into some video game. It saddens me when I hear that children can not demonstrate basic reading skills for their grade level. I feel as if a part of me dies. Reading scores are down for high school seniors, and reading proficiency rates among adults are stagnant or falling. WAKE UP PEOPLE THIS IS A SERIOUS PROBLEM. I mean do we really want the future leaders of our country to be like this man?

My love for reading is something I am instilling in my own children. I love it when I see my oldest daughter reading to her younger sister, or sitting in her favorite chair with a book in her hands. It is a big treat for her when I take her to the book store and let her pick out some new books. So imagine my total and utter disbelief when I seen this sign:

And they wonder why the reading and comprehension rates in this country are falling. I mean this is a book store you’d think one employee or customer would of noticed this error. Maybe, hopefully someone did and it just laziness keeping the correction from being made. My friends a little white out, or sticker could fix that right up. Screw the legal ramifications about customers climbing ladders in the store I’d gladly volunteer to fix it for you.

Keep reading and remember reading less of course, translates into reading less well.

huked on foniks wurked fer me

2007-12-19T08:26:00.000-05:00

This is why my friends the phrase, “Do you want fries with that?” will be an integral part of so many people's vocabulary. Honestly now, if the school cannot even spell education what hope is there for our country's future? If this is the way they are teaching adults I shudder to think what they are doing to our children. And they wonder why grades all over the nation are dropping. I guess I should give them a point for the use of due instead of do. But it still does not make up for the other error.

Tsk,tsk,tsk.

Yo Gabba Gabba

2007-12-18T13:26:00.001-05:00

Anyone else hate this show? My youngest loves it, adores it has to watch it daily, (hooray for the weekends when it is not aired).

I think it is down right creepy. I see this show and want to scream WTF IS THAT? Just look at the characters now if they don't scream sex to you I don't know what will. One looks like a dildo, another a butt plug, one is a pussy cat and the other a patch of hair. (I’ll call him Muffy with the French tickler on his head). The robot with a hole in it. Oh and we cannot forget DJ Lance who "always wears a hat" (nudge nudge, wink wink). What wonderful choices of characters for a show aimed at the pre-school set. I can just see the creators sitting around a television stoned out of their minds in a circle jerk, while lesbian porn is playing on a 42 inch screen. Thinking boy wouldn’t a giant talking and singing dildo make a great character for a kid’s show. I bet Junior would love that.

Yo Gabba Gabba kind of reminds me of a mix between The Banana Splits and those downright freaky Sid and Marty Krofft shows, H.R. Pufnstuff, (what the hell were they puffin' when they thought of this show?), Lidsville, Sigmund and the Sea Monster, Land of the Lost.

All I need now if for her to start singing some of the annoying songs that they sing on this show. For example the Snack song, "Snacky snacky snacky snack, snack" Just those words over and over again. Its enough to cause any sane parent to drive an ice pick into their brain.

If You Can't Differentiate Between "Your" and "You're" You Deserve To Die

2007-12-17T23:58:00.002-05:00

Seriously now it is not that hard. Just try it. It is frightening how many individuals fail to understand the difference between the words "you're" and "your".

Let me make this simple for some of you out there.

you're = It is a contraction, a combination of the words you and are.
For example:
"You're an idiot if you cannot differentiate between the two." ("YOU ARE an idiot if you cannot differentiate between the two.")*

"I don't know what you're talking about." ("I don't know what YOU ARE talking about.")

your = The word your is the possessive form of you, referring to something that a person has, or something that belongs to the person in discussion (or, the person you are talking to).
For example:
"Is your head wrapping around this concept yet?"
"Your improved grammar will make me very happy."

I swear to you this is a very important thing to learn!
You don't want to end up like this dumb ass.

Now and forever everyone will know that you can't spell with shit. I don't know who is more to blame here with this. The dumb ass that gave the design to the tattoo artist, or the tattoo artist for not noticing the error. I mean one would think that the artist would have picked up on it, after all he/she is permanently altering your body. Or maybe he/she did notice and thought what a dumb shit and that he deserves to be ridiculed for the rest of his life. (I'd like to think the latter, yes I do have a sadistic streak in me).

And please remember don't be a homophobe, homophones are your friends.

Amigone?

2007-12-17T09:57:00.001-05:00

Ok I will admit it I have some strange hobbies, one of them is visiting cemeteries and looking for unusual markers or names listed on head stones. Some people find it weird, morbid and down right creepy. But I find it to be a very relaxing experience. Some cemeteries are so beautiful and peaceful. Others hold such historical significance, or have famous people buried within them. Their final resting places turned into shrines. While others seem to just be there going without a lot of notice. (Rick James for example, The King of Funk, you'd think his grave would attract lots of visitors but it just is not so).

On one of my trips I came across this headstone,

Umm yeah, if I have to venture a guess I would have to say Yes, yes you are gone. This is from a local family that runs a chain of funeral homes no less. The name in combination with the business has always cracked me up. Just to show you that I am not making this up, is the link to their website: www.amigone.com

This is one of those things that I have said over and over I should take a picture of and send in to Jay Leno for one of his bits. I think it might have a good chance of actually making it to the air.